Discussing the wedding

Well, I managed to get some key wedding conversation started during our drive up to where Ivón's dad lives. It's enough for me to start doing some significant initial planning without having to force V to endure more of my pestering questions for a while... a couple of weeks, at least!! ::grin:: What we discussed:

• It's important to V. that the Jewish rituals that we include have a significance that is important to both of us, and not just significant to someone who is Jewish. Totally related to that, V. wants to make sure that we include an explanation of the significance of the Jewish elements as part of the service. For example, I hadn't realized that V. didn't know that the chuppah represented our home (and I forgot to tell him that to some it also represents the marriage bed!) that is open to the family and friends who are there to support our relationship.
  
• It's important to V. that it not be highly religious, though some prayers are ok. I can understand that: I know that if I were marrying someone Christian, I'd want references to Jesus kept to a bare minimum; no, truthfully, I'd want Jesus kept out of it altogether, or at least any references to Jesus as the son of God, as with regards to things along the lines of "whosoever believeth in him shall not perish but have everlasting life." I believe in Jesus and think that his teachings and the example he set overall were wonderful and meaningful and important - in fact I think Christianity would benefit substantially if more Christians acted like he did and didn't condemn folks to hell just because they looked or acted or believed differently. But I just don't personally believe that anyone is responsible for my sins other than me, or that believing in someone means more than how you live your life. But I digress. The point is, if I know in my heart that I'd want to place limits on what was going to be said if the person I was marrying was of a different faith, then I have to respect that my basically agnostic partner should be allowed to place limits on the religious details in our wedding. Fortunately, for a Jewish wedding to be "kosher" there's very little that's required, and most of what we consider part of a Jewish wedding is tradition but not halacha (required by Jewish law). Not that our wedding is exactly kosher in a lot of folks eyes, but again I digress...
• We're probably going to bag the outdoor wedding idea, though we are (ok, who am I kidding, I am) going to look for a venue where we could be outside if the weather is perfect and inside if there's any chance or rain, humidity, or serious hot flash.
  
• We're going to buy him a totally awesome suit and have it tailored to fit perfectly. It will certainly cost many times more than my dress, which is obviously a switch, but that's totally cool with me: I have and will continue to have lots of chances to feel pretty in a dress; V will have very few chances beyond this to wear the perfectly tailored suit of his dreams. Plus there's going to be so much more of what I want and do in this wedding, so it's important to me that the few things that really are important to him are really done up right. He really like the nehru-collar jackets and I think he'd look so fab in one that I'd probably be tempted to jump him right there under the chuppah.